Currently Listening Ocean Avenue By Yellowcard Breathing see related

So I'v been learnin alot about myself lately. I worry about other people soo much, that I don't stop to think about what I'm doing anymore. I trust almost no one, lie to almost everyone, and then make them feel bad about shit that never even happened because of my own insecurity. I need to grow up, but why is everything so different now? I had a handle on everything until recently. Now I'm a loose cannon and I can't control my feelings. I hurt the people I care most about. I don't know why but it keeps happening and im not gonna let it n e more. I need to start bein mature about the shit I do and it starts now. There is so much I wanna change but I can't and I know it and it hurts so bad but I have to make this move.

"How am I supposed to feel about the things I've done?
I don't know if I should stay or turn around and run
I know that I hurt you, things will never be the same
The only love I ever knew, I threw it all away."                                
 ~Yellowcard - Breathing~  *381*____*22804*                                                                            

~L8r - Chrispy~

Fuck school man! I got so much shit to do and im still gonna fail religion class. Def. gonna be grounded for like 2 months! Fuck that man I need to get my shit together. I need to start concentrating on what I gotta do and quit puttin shit off! But there is no way Im gonna get that paper done anytime soon! Oh fuckin well. New start at the end of the quarter, Hopefully I can start doin my shit and keeping up with it. The only thing goin good right now is Basketball, and Kelly. But I feel like I don't have time for everything, and its soo frustrating, especially work school and payin my bills. But things can only get better now. Im ready for the consequences of failing religion. L8r

Chris

Talk about stress..... Let's see, Birthday, sucked, Christmas, I worked and saw no one from my family, New Year's Eve, fought with Kelly about stupid shit when I was drunk, and now I found out the my Friend Katie got in a car accident last night and is in ICU at Toledo Hospital. Then I am Failing Religon class, I have two papers due tomarrow that I havent't even started, Three test to make up before the end of the quarter, not to mention Exams, while were at it might as well throw in that im worried when im gonna be able to afford a card, pay insurance and my phone bill. Sometimes I just don't even wanna wake up to face the next day, but Kelly keeps me goin. We aren't fighting anymore, I love her too much to go, but Im so tired of school and all this stress im gettin from my dad always bitchin about EVERYTHING! Im never right its never good enough Im always fuckin up. Oh well when Im 18 me n Kelly are movin out n gettin an apartment, as soon as school is out. Im gonna try n find out if Katie is ok. L8r. Our prayers are with you Katie!

Chris

So today went perfect except when I came home and found out my dog has worms.... I hung out with kelly All day we went to PSP and got my fish tank stuff, n set all that up, it looks soo cool we did a really good job! And then we went n picked up my brother and took him to my moms new apartment. Its too sweet! So much better than the other place! We left there and Went to the Lights at the Zoo. That was pretty cool cz we got to relax and talk and just enjoy everything. Then I had to stop by my gmas house to get my christmas stuff Cz I have to work when everyone is getting together tomarrow. It works tho cz Kelly never met my grandparents, so we got to do all that! Then i took Kelly out to eat to a resturant of her choice (Glad she picked Big Boy's!~ lol) It was kool tho I think the waitress was hitting on her lmao! So after that we ran to Kellys house and wrapped her presents and watch part of the 40 year old Virgin, but it was like 1 30 so I had to leave. So I came home to two big piles of shit in my room and im bout ready to beat the hell outta my dog for it and i seen worms!!!! Fuckin gross! So I told my dad n he help me clean it up. I feel so bad for the lil shit. He always has problems. But My dad was pretty awesome. Me n kelly are doin great and Im savin money for my car. now I just gotta do god in school. Im of to bed, I gotta work from 12 to 7 tomarrow!

L8r

Chrispy!

Currently Listening In the Wake of Determination By Story of the Year see related

Dude Tomarrow is gonna be sooo busy! I got work from 8-4 and then i have a game at 4 , So i have to miss kellys game But I get to hang out with her after the game along with matt! We're goin to go see story of the year! Its gonna be too sweet! Yesterday and today won't be so bad. Yesterday I was gonna take kelly to the lights at the zoo but she had to work and we were supposed to go to a party after that but one it got moved to a diff place and two i heard it was booty! SO I didnt get to see her last night but me n mike went to the SFS v.s. Libby Game. Worst called game EVER!! The refs sucked so bad. and we still won by like 9. After that we went to the Ice House to watch Mikes gf play Broomball. Then we just chilled. I talked to kelly til about 1 30 and had to get up at 8 today for Bowling. I did not wanna get outta bed. Sleep inertia was settin in big time! But I made it and i did pretty good. I had a 138 a 198 and a 199. So thats a 535 series with a 178.6 average! Pretty good! Im gettin better! I have to work at 4 today so im prolli gonna go get some sleep!

L8r -_Chrispy*^~